Monday, December 24, 2012

20 Questions: Mrs. Claus

Last year, I managed to procure an interview with the Jolly Old Elf himself--and it's easily the most popular post I've ever done. I think it speaks wonders about the world--that no matter how desperate the times or depressing the headlines, folks are still looking to learn more about Santa Claus and they still turn to Christmas for comfort.

This year, I thought it would be wonderful to get an interview with Santa's other half--and I have no doubt he would call her his better half--Mrs. Claus. It took some doing, but just in time for Christmas, she came through like a champ. Just a short chat with the woman behind the man that is St. Nick reveals a lot about how the Christmas spirit endures, and why folks continue to turn to Santa each year for hope, inspiration and embodiment of the season. 

Mrs. Claus, it turns out, is just as festive and just as committed to making Christmas what it is... to putting smiles on the faces of kids the world over. That she does it behind the scenes is no less remarkable than the deeds of her magical husband. 

Enjoy getting to know Santa's significant other. On with the questions:

What is your idea of perfect happiness? 
The sound of sleigh bells in the snow in the wee hours of Christmas morning—the signal of another safe journey completed.

What is your greatest fear? 
Not hearing those bells in the wee hours of Christmas morning.

Young Martha Washington
Which historical figure do you most identify with? 
I would have to say Martha Washington… it takes quite a woman to stand behind such a great man—I know exactly how she must have felt.

Which living person do you most admire?
His Holiness, the 14th Dalai Lama … a message of peace is never the wrong message, even if people don’t often choose to receive it.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? 
 I’m a total busybody. Can’t help it.

What is the trait you most deplore in others? 
The refusal to slow down and feel the season… to race out into the night just for a bargain. Is it really bargain if you sacrifice time with your loved ones?

What is your favorite journey? 
Every January, Santa takes me to Christmas Island to recover from the Holidays… You wouldn’t know it, but I’m can double-haul like Lefty Kreh, and bonefish fear me.

On what occasion do you lie? 
“No dear, that red suit doesn’t make your butt look big at all.”

What is your greatest regret? 
That we can’t make everyone believe.

What or who is the greatest love of your life? 
That’s easy … a jolly old elf with a certain verve for pleasing children the world over.

Which talent would you most like to have? 
I can’t understand a word the reindeer say… Santa talks to them all the time, and I have no idea what they’re saying to each other.

What do you consider your greatest achievement? 
Not many people know this, but the idea of putting sleigh bells on the reindeer harnesses? That was mine.

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be? 
If I die, there will be one lonely old elf who can’t find his boots. Cross your fingers that never happens.

Where would you like to live? 
Right where I live now, with the wonderful husband, all these busy little elves and the livestock we have.

Home, sweet home.
Who are your favorite writers? 
 Charles Dickens, Clement Moore … and Janet Evanovich (guilty pleasure, but who doesn’t have one?)

Who are your heroes? 
Oskar Schinlder, Mother Theresa, King Wenceslas and a certain little boy who played the drums.

What’s on your iPod?
Bing Crosby, Elvis, Nat King Cole … and FUN.

If you were a pet, what would your name be? 
Quite the dish, indeed...
Santa calls me his pet all the time, even after all these years. You wouldn’t know it, but I used to be quite the dish.

What would your profession be if you couldn’t do what you do now? 
 I have honestly never given a single thought to another line of work.

If there is a Heaven, and you go to Heaven, what would God say to you upon your arrival? 
Don’t be silly… I’ll always be in Heaven so long as I live at the North Pole with Santa.

What’s the favorite of all the cars you’ve ever driven? 
I’ve never driven a car, but once, after Santa had a touch too much egg nog, I did get to drive the sleigh home from the pub. It corners like it’s on rails and really gets up and goes if you give the reindeer their heads.

BONUS QUESTION: What’s your favorite guilty pleasure? 
Well—and I’m blushing here—I absolutely love Marvin Gaye’s song, “Let’s Get it On.” I think Santa likes it, too.


  1. Well done, my friend. Merry Christmas to you and yours. And that photo of Mrs. Santa? She makes me want to be bad.

  2. Oh my, such a lovely Mrs. Claus. Good job and Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

  3. I believe Mrs Clause.... I believe-

  4. Merry Christmas, all... here's to a wonderful new year!

  5. Merry Christmas to Chris and family- la casa de heitman

  6. The idea that Bone Fish fear Mrs. Claus is all I needed!
    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!